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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Three Men Captured by Fierce Tribal Warriors

My brother-in-law loves a good joke. He told me this one on the occasion of our first meeting almost 25 years ago, and it's been a favorite of mine ever since. Hope you enjoy it, too. If you don't...well, just chalk it up to my weird sense of humor.

A Frenchman, an Englishman and a Texan were captured by fierce tribal warriors during America's Wild West days.

The tribal chief came to them and said, "The bad news is that, now that we've caught you, we're going to kill you, and then use your skins to make a canoe. The good news is that you get to choose how to die."

The Frenchman said, "I take ze poison." The chief gave him some poison extracted from local berries. The Frenchman cried, "Viva la France!" and drank down the poison.

The Englishman said, "A pistol for me, please." The chief hesitated over that request but decided, if they gave him just one bullet and watched him carefully, he couldn't really do any harm. So he gave him an old pistol. The Englishman pointed it at his head, cried, "God save the queen!", and blew his brains out.

The Texan said, "Gimme a fork." The chief was puzzled, but he shrugged his shoulders and gave him a fork. The Texan took the fork, cried, "Remember the Alamo!", and started jabbing himself repeatedly, all over his body, with the fork.

The chief was appalled and screamed, "What are you doing?"

The Texan looked at the chief and said, defiantly, "See if THIS will float!"

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13 comments:

  1. GrayquillMay 10, 2011 at 1:42 AM

    Defiance to the end –YES!
    That was a good one. Thanks for the laugh.

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  2. DeborahMay 10, 2011 at 4:48 AM

    LOL I loved it!

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  3. Ruth HiebertMay 10, 2011 at 8:24 AM

    OK,it took me a minute to get it.Maybe I'm just a slow,but it is a good one.

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  4. LoriMay 10, 2011 at 8:53 AM

    LOl Thank you for the morning laugh...good medicine for my soul. Love and hugs to you Linda. XX

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  5. Out on the prairieMay 10, 2011 at 10:05 AM

    Very nice, I love it!

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  6. Linda at To Behold The BeautyMay 10, 2011 at 10:12 AM

    GQ - Glad I could give you a chuckle this morning.

    Deborah - I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

    Ruth - Yes, you had to catch the canoe reference for it to make sense. Glad you enjoyed it.

    Lori - So glad it made you laugh. If anyone needs that kind of medicine, it's you right now.

    Steve - Thanks. I'm glad you liked it.

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  7. Betsy Banks AdamsMay 10, 2011 at 11:12 AM

    Cute Linda.... Made me laugh!!!!!!
    Hugs,
    Betsy

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  8. Linda at To Behold The BeautyMay 10, 2011 at 4:23 PM

    Good, Betsy. That was the plan. :)

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  9. Cicero SingsMay 10, 2011 at 6:06 PM

    Very cute!!!

    I was just reading your comment over on Christian Widows' blog:

    He said, "Mary is with Jesus, and Jesus is with me."

    I read something similar soon after D died and it was a great comfort to me ... and this was a great reminder!

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  10. HilaryMay 10, 2011 at 10:38 PM

    Fun stuff, Linda. :)

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  11. Linda at To Behold The BeautyMay 10, 2011 at 11:03 PM

    Welcome, Cicero Sings. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. I'm glad, too, if my comment on the Christian Widow's Place was an encouragement to you. That mental picture seems to pop into my mind often, and it's always a comfort.

    Thanks, Hilary.

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  12. SandraMay 11, 2011 at 9:29 AM

    The advantage of a bad memory? You've probably told this to me before (maybe even more than once!), but I laughed just like this was the first time! :)

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  13. Linda at To Behold The BeautyMay 11, 2011 at 9:58 AM

    Sandra - Ha! I can't remember if I've told you this one or not, so we're even. :)

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